BHG Articles

So, your husband works long hours and you dont feel he is there for you anymore. On the other side of the coin, your husband thinks that you spend all of your time meeting the childrens needs and so he feels that you don’t have time for his needs. Sounds familiar? If so, do you think this relationship can be saved? Should it be saved? The answer is yes and here’s how you can actually do it in a step-by-step process.

Make sure that you really want to save the relationship. Before you put an effort towards saving your relationship you need to be sure if you think that it is worthy of saving. You can’t save it alone though, both of you must decide that you want to make the relationship work. If not, all efforts will be for nothing. Saving the relationship because it is more convenient that way or because of your childres, won’t put your relationship back to work.

Identify the problems in your relationship. This can be very difficult to many. Many people do have tendencies to believe that the symptoms of the problem are the actual problem itself. For example, lack of intimacy can be a problem to any relationships. And lack of intimacy leads to a straying partner. But seldom are those who can actually pinpoint what the real problem is, resulting them to just fix the problem of a straying partner. So let’s say that you’ve stopped the affair of your partner. What do you think happens next? It will definitely just lead to another affair, because you’ve failed to deal with the core issues.

Begin to hear your thoughts. This must be a two-way communication. This means both verbalizing your own feelings and listening to your partners concerns. Show sincerity to your partner while holding your partners hand as you speak about your problems. This will show your partner that you want to reconnect even when your emotions are swirling. As your discussions go along, your partner might talk about things that can hurt you, keep in mind that the words are meant to improve your relationship… not to hurt you.

Create an action plan to solve the problem. Then, take concrete steps on your action plan. Planning a date night every week will be helpful. Also, take turns coming up with creative ways to spend an evening together. If not communicating is the problem, commit to spending 20 minutes before going to bed just talking to one another. And, then do it.

You must understand that once you commit to save your relationship, you are committing to the whole process of it. As you move forward, there will be moments of joy and there will also be moments of sorrow.

If your relationship is worth saving, there is no reason whatsoever why you shouldn’t put forth an effort to save your relationship.